microsoft once again exhibits their ability to run at the cutting edge of home gaming...

...by announcing a ROBOCOP themed game for the xbox console.

related link: http://gamespot.com/gamespot/stories/news/0,10870,2899121,00.html

once again, xbox shows they are on the cutting edge of trends in the gaming industry, this time unleashing a hot new game based on a movie released theatrically in 1987, no less than one and a half decades ago.

This cutting edge game comes on the tails of another up-to-the-minute release for the xbox, Serious Sam, released Nov. 15 2002. With Serious Sam 2 for PC released on Jan 25 2002 and the original released for PC in March 2001, one can only marvel at the delight of Microsoft bringing a 2 year old game to the xbox. Were this not enough, Microsoft decided to give us the original, even after the sequel has been on PC desktops worldwide for 11 months.

...The best part is, people actually BUY xboxes. How in de hell.

[No Comments]

Newness....REALLY

OK, yes I've said it many times before..but this time I SWEAR, a new design is coming. It's still in production stages, but Mr. Sanbourne has seen the preliminary design and it has his seal of approval, and what else matters? Nothing. So stay tuned, It could be up by the end of the super-extended-holiday weekend.

[15 comments]

News of the Weekend

I felt it a post was in order to rectify the rampant comments being made, twisting and mangling the story…

So here’s how it played out: This weekend was an all-Lex weekend. I left work early on Friday to get down to Lex (3 hr drive + the hour time loss = 4 hrs) and got there at about 7:30 to meet with some friends. Since I am not familiar with the Lex I didn’t really have much of an idea what to do. We ended up at Cheddar’s and then just chilled for the rest of the night. It was good times. Saturday I did a little reminiscing in the “Centre of Nowhere”, as Kenny puts it, and that was also good. After that, a return trip to Lex was in order to visit a totally separate group of friends. But upon my return, I realized that I had no idea what to do there since I am not a native of that land. Therefore an Emaline call was placed for a reconnaissance mission to a nightlife attraction. I mentioned the Comedy Club there, and I was given assurances that it would be looked into. Some 2-3 hours later it had still not been. I was given the number to the club, but the “I called and nobody answered” seemed a highly unlikely possibility.

Anyway, upon my own checking, (and this was at 7:20pm, mind you) I found out that
a) there were 3 shows: 7, 9:30, and 11:30. and the last two were sold out
b) the thing cost $25
c) you had to be 21 to get in

So we were shot down on three counts with that idea. We ended up just going around UK’s campus to this tight poster shop, the aforementioned BeyondTheWall. I was a backseat rider in this instance. There were four of us, 3 guys, 1 girl. The girl had rented a new Grand Am for the lex trip apparently because we had come down to see one of my friends on co-op there. So the guy that is pseudo-dating her is driving. I tell him to park somewhere on the street near the shop. But he decides that he should just park at the Fazoli’s. We had planned on eating at said establishment after posters had been obtained. Time: 7:40pm. We go to the poster shop, buy our posters, and leave since they closed at 8pm. (FYI: every single poster in the store is now $5. ALL means ALL, so the sign says. Sale lasts until Wednesday. Get them while supplies last).
Ok, time: 8:04. we stand in Fazoli’s parking lot, and at the empty spot we knew we parked at. After mild panic at what seemed to be a case of "stolen car", we saw a cop was stopped at the stop light and he told us he just saw a car get towed off. So we go in and find out that the manager had us towed. I mean, it basically defies logic. Is it possible that the manager could’ve seen the car there, asked everyone in the building if it was their car (as she said she did), called the tow truck place, they get there, hook it all up, and tow it, all in the span of 25 minutes? They said it was checked into the tow truck place at 8:10, and I know it took us a good 10 min to get there.

Ah, but I’m getting ahead of myself. There we were, stranded like rats. The two front seat riders were freaking out, but my co-oping friend and I were just basically ticked that we were stuck at Fazoli’s. One of the girls that worked there felt sorry for us I guess because she gave us breadsticks to eat and some drinks. She even offered to let us crash at her place if we had nowhere else to go. It was a nice gesture, but bordered on going a little bit overboard. Anyway, emergency distress calls were made. First up was to a certain Derek Poore. Unfortunately he was indisposed in the RVK supposedly “programming a slot machine” for unnamed purposes. 2nd attempt at distress flares: dave. He was on the road at that point though so he was of no assistance. He said he’d call when he got to kolonay’s house but I never received any such transmission. If I would’ve died, dave, then I would have been pissed off at you.

As it turned out, another of our friends was on his way at the moment anyway. He ended up getting there about 20 min later and we rolled 5 deep in his 2 door hatchback civic to the tow truck place. Crazy rottweiler dog and $114 later, we got out of there with car in hand. So all in all, it was a good night.

[5 comments]

News o' the day

PLASTIC: Woman's Sex Toys Run Afoul Of Texas Penal Code
Texas woman arrested for having 17 sex toys in her car. Were they all dildos? All french ticklers? Sanbourne specials? Assortment?

Santas Undergo Background Checks

Kenny's last pledge as Radio Shack employee comes true

IN the navy

[4 comments]

animuL-2 ATTACKED : AITSU suspect

At shortly after 20:20 CST -- just south of the Logan Aluminum Plant in Russellville, Kentucky -- A herd of deer managed to attack the animuL-2. While details are still sketchy at this point in time, local officials have hinted at the possibility of an AITSU attack. No further details were given, and when questioned about the possibility of the One Emaline's involvement as a possible double agent, investigators offered no response.

As more details are uncovered we will keep you informed.

Until then, you can download a copy of the damage in a desktop wallpaper version below.
animul-2 Attacked : Official Desktop Wallpaper

[16 comments]

The War of the One Emaline

In the beginning, Kenneth, The One, lived in the Void. He felt empty in the Void and wished there were something in the Void to praise him. Therefore, Kenneth, The One, created NOTD and two sets of choirs, the Smileys and the Dereks. But NOTD still felt empty to Kenneth, The One. As such, Kenneth, The One, created beings to live in NOTD and praise him further more. The High Sanborns and Dark Jeffs, who were both beautiful and had pointy ears, were created and they praised Kenneth greater and more willfully than any other race. Thusly, the First Age of NOTD was set into motion. In the beginning of the First Age, all was peaceful. However, a dark force who craved to replace Kenneth was forged in the Super Unknown. It was known as AITSU. At the end of the First Age, Kenneth and the choirs had banished the leader of AITSU, but AITSU's power was not relinquished. The Second Age of NOTD had been forged and Kenneth felt it necessary to create other beings. The Daves were of a normal stature and craved nothing more than power and the Kolonays were smallish and stout in stature and had hairy feet.
Unbeknownst to the Free Peoples of NOTD, AITSU held its power in the One Emaline, and the knowlegde of its existence was unknown to NOTD. A great war was fought among the Free Peoples of NOTD against AITSU. In the end, the Free Peoples of NOTD triumphed and AITSU was thought to have perished, however the power was kept alive within the One Emaline. Thus, the Second Age of NOTD was over and the Third Age was kindled. The One Emaline was lost to AITSU and laid dormant for many years.
During the Third Age, a certain Kolonay came across the One Emaline in his travels and kept it in his possesion. During this time, the power of AITSU began to grow again and the Free Peoples heard whispers of a Lidless Dave that would enslave them all. The Kolonay that had found the One Emaline began to grow weary and felt the presence of the evil within it. This caused an alert among the Free Peoples and a council was held among the Sanborns, Jeffs, Daves and Kolonays. And so, there was sent out a quest to destroy the One Emaline in the depths of the Super Unknown. The Fellowship of this quest was made of a certain Dave, Jeff, Sanborn and Kolonay. They carried the One Emaline into the depths of the Super Unknown and hence-forth vanquished AITSU from NOTD for the end of time. And in this act, the Third Age of NOTD was ended and the Fourth Age, in which the Jeffs and Sanborns found NOTD dull and grey, was begun.

[18 comments]

Bitch, you're schoolin' no one!

That's right, I took smiley to school last night at NES Monopoly.

Everyone knows Tennis, and Mario are for lamers...but monopoly...that's where the skill is.

[2 comments]

Time Circuts ON

In a fit of bordom I started just looking for things to do online when I stumbled upon Archive.org. Apparently this is an outfit that has set up shop as THE place to come see the archives of the entire internet. This includes Notd.net (click for archives ala WAYBACK MACHINE). Didn't know such a thing could be done. Cool site.

[2 comments]

psychos

we're going to set fire to bystanders and stab them in the face! in the name of muslimness! but we're not psychos! you stupid americans are unfairly discriminating against our people! we are not a violent radical group! now come here so we can stab you and set you on fire for being on the street when we're pissed! YAR!

http://www.cnn.com/2002/WORLD/africa/11/21/nigeria.missworld.ap/index.html

[1 Comment]

The Day the News Stood Still

Finally after endless waiting, one of the best damned Sci-Fi movies to ever be made is coming to DVD ala 20th Century Fox Special Edition.

The Day the Earth Stood Still - A classic story about a visiting space alien (Klaatu) and his giant metal robot (Gort), who is sent to tell the earth to live in peace with the rest of the (modern?) galaxy. Set right after WWII and the US bombing of Japan, Klaatu tells the people that they must stop all the fighting on earth or they will all be destroied. He brings that robot along just to have something to get his back, and you just know there's going to be trouble with it (and there is).

On a side note, here's some trivia for ya. In Army of Darkness, Ash was told to say some words before picking up the book of the dead, those words were taken right out of Day the Earth Stood Still for turning off Gort.... Klaatu Barada Nikto.

[4 comments]

quote of the night

from the del show:

"any y'all here got gameboy advance? (a few cheer) yeah, it's pretty sick, huh!"

[2 comments]

Some Eminem for sale

Marshall Mathers's boyhood home, located in Warren, Michigan, is now for sale on eBay. Last time I check it was up to 1.1 million dollars. Hopefully, this will become the new site for NOTD World Headquarters. Kenny start your bidding...NOW.

THE PALACE

[13 comments]

Interesting Mail

Well I arrived home from class aobut 20 minutes ago and went to the mailbox. I found a couple of interesting things there. First off, "America's Army" (The Official U.S. Army Game). Wow, I'm shocked. Many months ago you could go sign up on the internet to get a free copy. I did, and after waiting, and more waiting I just figured nothing would come from it and they just wanted the addresses of young men for potential Mass "join the army" mailings. I suppose I was wrong.

Also seen in that picture is the other letter I got today. It's from a domain registration company called Register.com. Now, I like many other people I'm sure, don't freely give out my home address on the internet other than on secure sites when I'm ordering products. My personal information with my current domain registration service hints at my location, but does not pin-point it. Apparently, however, this makes no difference at all. This Letter made it directly to my door even though it is clearly addressed to:

Kenneth Fyhr
Notd Net
123 My St.
Rvk, KY 42276

For those of you who aren't quite sure, there is no "My Street" in the town of "Rvk, KY" (which doesn't even exist to begin with). I suppose it was the zip code that got me. I wonder if it's just that I'm in such a small town that the post office actually took the time to track down where I lived based only on my name? I doubt I would have gotten this letter if I lived in New York City... but who knows?

[5 comments]

auto group begins 'what would jesus drive?' ads; hostess begins 'what would jesus eat?' ads

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/ap/20021113/ap_on_bi_ge/jesus_drives_2

A Pennsylvania-based environmental group is planning television advertising in North Carolina, Iowa, Indiana and Missouri to urge consumers to park their pollutive SUVs — Jesus would prefer a cleaner auto, the group contends.

In a related story, Hostess has begun a similar campaign under the moniker "What would Jesus eat?", contending that the Son of God would enjoy a diet of snack foods and golden sponge cakes with creamy filling.

[9 comments]

What if it goes out and melts down a busload of nuns, how would you like to write the headline on that one?

The London Times headline: "IBM STARTS WORK ON COMPUTER TO RIVAL THE FYHR-BOTS"

"THE first supercomputers to approach and even surpass the processing power of the human brain are to be built by IBM, under a £184 million contract announced by the US Government yesterday.

"ASCI Purple and Blue Gene/L will be the fastest and most powerful machines built, with a combined capacity equal to the 500 best of today’s computers."

More From Times Online

Squash - dead. Disassemble - dead. DISASSEMBLE - DEAD! NO DISASSEMBLE NUMBER FIVE!!

[4 comments]

Mix

1 part computer
1 part TV
1 part Mystikal cd
1 part tequila
1 part camel lights
1 part toasty room
shake well
serve!

[2 comments]

stupid college

i swear i thought i would never get this paper written. see, i have a 6-8 page paper due in my anthropology class tomorrow (today, monday) at noon. topic? workers rights in south korea. yeah. so my research sucked up until yesterday when i got a FEW articles.. and it took a trip to two libraries to get 10 books today, then more internet research, then a modification on my angle in the paper to get it finally written. final stats?

length:
required: 6-8 pages, not including title/citations pages
utilizied: 11 pages (14 including 1 title and 2 citations pages)

words:
required: no requirement
utilized: 2,347

references:
required - 5
utilized - 16

final summary: OMFG KIDS, DONT GO TO COLLEGE ITS A WASTE OF YOUR TIME. join the circus.

[6 comments]

P to the ETA

Typical PETA fashion

What was supposed to be a sexy, intimate fashion show -- featuring such high-fashion hotties as Heidi Klum, 29, and Tyra Banks, 28, -- turned into a staging ground for animal-rights protesters.

More...

Goddamn those Peta bastards for ruining a good time for my favorite pretty ladies.

[3 comments]

Abe & Dr. Riker

[08:31] decay3d: OMG
[08:31] decay3d: DEREK ON DEREK, the epic interview.

Also, I found this today in the front window of a newspaper machine on campus.

[2 comments]

just for the record.

4:39am PST. earliest. notd. post. ever.

[3 comments]

Guess what we found out today...

Needless to say, we were none too happy about it...

[6 comments]

One DVD to Rule Them All

I'm sure that tagline is copyrighted, and that New Line will be busting down the doors of NOTD Headquarters in BG, KY to get us to remove it, but, oh well...

Yesterday, after completing the most taxing day in my academic career (Eco401 AND Eco477 exams in the SAME DAY! one right after the other), I decided to reward myself for my academic diligence by purchasing the New Line Platinum Edition LOTR: The Fellowship of the Ring DVD. I didn't get the nice boxed one w/ the book ends, just the regular 4 disc set.

I must say that this is truly the best DVD ever. The picture? OMG! The sound? double OMG! The special features? i dunno, didn't get to them, the movie is too frickin' long... This DVD is one of the first to take advantage of DTS EX6.1 surround audio. You simply must come over and watch it some time, the sound is simply INCREDIBLE!

I'm sure the special features are cool. They should be since there are over 10 hours of them!

The icing on the cake was the inclusion of a free movie pass to attend LOTR: Two Towers when it comes out in December. It's basically like an additional $10.50 off the price of the set of th DVDs (give or take depending on local rates for movie tix).

Bottom line, if you liked it, buy this version, you won't be disapointed. It just makes me wish I could go out and buy the other two films, but they've not even been shown in theatres yet.

[5 comments]

It's my birthday, and I'll cry if I wanna...

Well, some unfortunate news was made apparent to me today by my dear mother. My 23rd birthday will fall this year on the Sunday (Dec 1) while I am still in Ashland for Thanksgiving break. What this means is that if I were to throw myself a bday/NOTD party, I would have to do it either the week before or the week after. I think the week before is too short notice, SOOOOOOO, I want to hear your thoughts on a shibang here at the Kolonay Dude Ranch in Lex-Vegas on either December 6th (Friday) or December 7th (Saturday). Post if you'd come or not, and which night you'd prefer.

Thanks...

[16 comments]

This is a real post. This is not a test.

Woke up quick at about 8. I had to get to algebra before Mrs. Kilborn arrived, I wanted to prepare myself for the man-woman being that is a femme-kilby. Then I played tetris on my TI89 until it crashed halfway through class.

After that monstrosity, I was made aware in my journalism class of the female to male makeup. There's 68% girls and a few guys and some midgets, and a monk, and a lobster.

At one o'clock, my English comp teacher explained that proper MLA style is "Author, Title, Date, Volume, Issue, Page, Printing location, City, State, Country, Continent, latitude, longitude, planet, sexual orientation of the author's twin sister, and the URL of the source, and my cpu speed."

Starbucks has these new Christmas themed drinks. Try the Peppermint Mocha Frappucino... it's candy, it's the truth.

I'm at work now, and I'm not using my Smiley-commissioned AIM name infoDeskDerek, due to the fact that I'm using AOL "turbo" and can't import contact listeses.

[No Comments]

Kenny's at it again

Kenny's obscene driving was spotted near AITSU battlegrounds--apparently on an reconnaissance mission gone terribly wrong. Apparently he's using the alias "Todd Trivelpiece."

MILLVILLE, Pennsylvania (AP) -- A truck rear-ended an Amish family's horse-drawn buggy Sunday, killing the mother and two children and injuring the father and one other child, state police said.

MORE--CNN

[4 comments]

Heat Vision and Kenny

I'm not sure if too many of you are aware of a little TV show that never was called "Heat Vision and Jack", so I'll inform you.

Heat Vision and Jack was a TV show idea that was turned in to a pilot, but never a full fledged series. Pitched to Fox in 1999, apparently they did not see the market potential of the show based on sheer star power. You see, it starred Jack Black as an "astronaut with a medical secret on the run from his evil employers with the help of a talking motorcycle called Heat Vision (voiced by Owen Wilson)." You can see right there that this show should have been made no questions asked.... and it's also directed by Ben Stiller. Oh, and the "medical secret" involves something with Jack Black getting exposed to the sun and getting superhuman intelligence. My, if only Notd.net had a television network to put this on.

[9 comments]

i have toys

[4 comments]

the next one...

...comes down.

[6 comments]

ST: TNOTD

Captain Kenny Picard Lt. Commander David Lieutenant Jeff Dr. Beverly "The Blade" Crusher Ensign Derek Crusher

Commander Smiley Riker Lt. Commander Geordie LaKolonay Chief Socks O'brien Counselor Emaline Troi *Q*born

[9 comments]

N*O*T*D

Lt. Col Kenneth M. Fyhr Major Derek "Ferret Face" Poore Major Jeremy Kolonay III Major Emily "Hot Lips" Fleming Father Scott Sanborn

Captain Ryan "Trapper" Coleman Captain Blade "Spearchucker" DeMarco Captain Dave "Hawkeye" Wheatley Corporal Jeff "Klinger" Zegarra Corporal Joseph "Radar" Frazier